An Unbearable Lightness of August

I confess that I have been especially bad writing for this blog. We finally closed on the house, and every day is one day closer to our move-in date. I like to think it's one step closer to being an actual adult.

Now that one poker is out out the fire, I have 9 more goals and 5 months to cross them off my list. First and foremost, to seriously get back to my job search.

I don't think I've ever juggled this many tasks at one time. Recognizing that there is too much on my plate has been something that I've been denial about for years. Coxing encompasses many tasks but one end goal. Everything else is never as important. But now, everything else feels so heavy. Pressing matters…

As stated before, this blog is not just about my life. I always look for a lesson, to explore the bigger picture. I turn 28 this month, and sometimes I feel that I don't have much to show for it. Although I have not hit as many "milestones" as my peers, everything has come in it's own time. Instead of focusing on what I don't have, I want to step back and remind myself of all the things I don't want.

I don't want to settle. I know this word is very polarizing and explosive. I've dated enough guys to know that the one I have is perfect for me. I've travelled to enough places to know that Atlanta is my home. I haven't travelled to enough places to want to stay in one place forever. I know my self enough to know that I haven't reached my peak. This last statement is paramount. I don't ever want to think that who I am now is as good as I'm ever going to be.

I don't want to feel helpless. One thing that I've always prided myself on is the ability to get out of a jam. Things go wrong and I don't freak out because I have the resources and the support system to fix the problem and move on. I don't want to ever feel like I can't rely on myself. 

"Everything will be alright in the end. If it's not alright, then it's not the end."-Best Exotic Marigold Hotel

I don't want to be unmotivated. When you rest, you rust. Only boring people are bored. I never want to be without inspiration, drive or a goal. We live longer when we know we have a job to do. 

My days always fluctuate between heavy and light. But in August, I chose to stay in the light. It's my own personal New Year to celebrate what I do have, and what I will eventually accomplish.